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Satan Unveils Ambitious Agenda For Fred Phelps’ Eternal Torment

WICHITA, Kan. -- Since news first broke about the impending death of former Westboro Baptist Church leader Fred Phelps, the premier topic circulating on...

Woman Takes Two Minute Sip Of Water To Avoid Kissing ‘Friend’...

FULLERTON, Calif. – Local resident Kaylee Tanner, 26, drank from a bottle of water from 11:59 p.m. on December 31st until 12:01 a.m. on...

Terrible Listener Pretty Sure He Won That Argument

SIMI VALLEY, Calif. – Local resident Anthony Zadikow believes he won a verbal altercation that he engaged in with colleague Paul Jacobs despite having...

Kobe Bryant Returns, Vows To Lead Lakers To Another First Round...

LOS ANGELES -- Following his 8-month absence recovering from a ruptured Achilles, Kobe Bryant returned to the basketball court Sunday night and promised to...

Grammy Announces Nominees For New ‘Best Performance Of Black Music By...

LOS ANGELES -- The Grammys have released their 2014 nominees, including all of the candidates for the inaugural “Best Performance of Black Music by...

Unemployed Cousin Demoted To Kid’s Table

CARMEL, Ind. -- Local unemployed man Chase Dobbs was sent down to the Kid's Table for this year’s Dobbs family Thanksgiving, his first time...

Linda Lovelace’s Ghost Regrets Starring In Paranographic Films

COCONUT GROVE, Fla. – The ghost of former adult film star Linda Lovelace says that she regrets starring in paranographic films and has taken...

Man Dressed As Spider-Man Watches Crime Happen, Does Nothing

SAN DIEGO – While walking home from a Halloween costume contest at the Blind Lady Ale House last night, Chris Antonelli, who was dressed...

Kanye Finally Proposes To Kanye

After a 36-year courtship, rapper/producer Kanye West finally decided to make it official by proposing to fashion mogul/aspiring messiah Kanye West last night at inexplicable...

Amy Poehler and Tina Fey to Open Center For Codependent Independent...

LOS ANGELES – Amy Poehler and Tina Fey have announced that they will be beginning yet another joint venture together with the opening of...
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