R. Kelly Fans Shocked That Man Who Had A Child Bride Also Has A Cult


CHICAGO — A bombshell exposé released on Monday involving R. Kelly and an alleged cult of young women he holds at his properties in Chicago and Atlanta, has shocked longtime fans of the R&B performer. Despite past court cases detailing horrific allegations and Kelly’s overwhelming track record of abusing young girls, his supporters simply cannot believe that this is the same musician they have known and loved ever since his 1994 marriage to then 15-year-old recording artist Aaliyah.

“It just couldn’t be in his nature to keep a cult of barely legal women that he promises fame to,” R. Kelly fan Dominic White expressed to the press this week. “I mean, yeah he did that to Aaliyah, but she was Aaliyah. She was going to be famous no matter what!”

Despite rabid R. Kelly fans knowing that the now 50-year-old Kelly met Aaliyah when she was only 14 and that he produced her debut album Age Ain’t Nothing but a Number, then married her a year later when she was 15 and lied on the marriage license to say that she was 18, many are still shocked by the new allegations coming forth. R. Kelly has also been tried and found not guilty, despite clear, videotaped evidence, of peeing on a young girl, a fact of which many casual music fans are also aware.

“Okay, yes, that video exists,” R. Kelly fan Ray Thornton wrote in the reply section of a Reddit thread. “But that video gave us a hilarious sketch from Dave Chappelle. Would you really rather that didn’t exist?! I didn’t think so.”

While it is known that sexual predators are often repeat offenders if they are not caught, and R. Kelly has repeatedly evaded punishment, his fans maintain that they did not see these cult accusations coming. Keeping child brides and controlling the lives of a group of women who you have isolated from their families might seem on par with cult leader behavior, but R. Kelly fans insist that this is just rockstar behavior– definitely not behavior that lines up with history’s other horrible cult leaders like Warren Jeffs, mostly because those awful men didn’t create masterpieces like “Trapped In The Closet.”

“I just can’t believe it,” Dominic said, wiping tears from his eyes. “Maybe those women really are in love with him. So much so that they all enjoy dressing exactly how he tells them and asking his permission to use the bathroom. Love works in mysterious ways, man.”

Stephanie Weber is probably too old for R. Kelly.

Image by Tim Mosenfelder/WireImage.