Nation’s Office Workers Take 6-Minute Vacation To Bathroom

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WASHINGTON, DC—A Gallup poll showed that the nation’s office workers took a 6-minute vacation to the bathroom today. “I decided that I needed to get away after my afternoon conference call, so I traveled to the men’s bathroom and took some me time,” said Bill Graves, one of the country’s 150 million employees who decided to use some of their paid time off for a restroom holiday.

According to sources, every single member of the workforce journeyed to their office lavatory not to use the toilets but to enjoy some rest and relaxation in the bathroom stalls by checking personal e-mails, playing a few minutes of Candy Crush, catching up with friends and family through text, or simply starring off into space accomplishing nothing.

Workers reportedly chose to take their retreat at varying parts of the day though the most popular time of departure was whenever the boss was in a meeting.

“I think it’s important to see new places, so I actually journeyed to the bathroom on the fourth floor,” added Mr. Graves.

At press time, the labor force was checking tomorrow’s calendar to see when they can schedule a return visit.

Tommy Molzahn needed three vacations today

Image by RustyClark