Money Management Techniques That Will Really Annoy Your Dad

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Anything can happen in your 20s: You can begin a career, or rent your first crappy apartment, or start a crazy-fun relationship with a lovable psychopath, or do anything else that sounds like something an adult would do. But whatever you choose to do in your 20s, one thing is guaranteed: You’re going to get a lot of financial advice from your dad. As your life evolves in cool new directions, manage your dad’s expectations by following these tried-and-true financial planning tips that are sure to really piss him off.

Investment Shoes
Your dad is always reminding you to plan for the future by putting a healthy sum of money toward a stable, safe investment. Well, those Jimmy Choo 5-inch stilettos may not be stable or safe, but at $795, they’re definitely an investment! Explain to your dad that these shoes are an investment in yourself: A guarantee of confidence, a representative of your professional potential, and if nothing else, a sure-fire way to keep you from quitting that temp job. After all, it’s gonna take a solid six months to pay down this Visa bill.

Invest In The Real Estate Market By Renting
Real estate is a really wise investment in the US. They say that the market generally trends up, which means there will generally be trendier and trendier apartments to choose from! So why on earth would you want to commit to one apartment forever? Keep on renting–just be sure to rent something fantastic. Conventional wisdom tells you to spend 30% your income on rent, but you’ve always been an overachiever, so why not shoot for 80%? Explain to your dad that real estate is a solid, reliable investment. It’s just one on which you’ll solidly, reliably never see a return.

Get In On The Ground Floor By Investing In Your Buddy’s App
Listen, Dad: It may not look like it, but your financial future is allll taken care of. You see, you had the foresight to invest that $5,000 Nanna gave you for graduation into Jerome’s app. And as soon as PizzaBoobsFlash! takes off, you’ll be raking it in. Just gotta have a little more patience. Gonna get rich any day now.

Go $7k In Credit Card Debt To Build That Rewards Program
Eventually, it may be time to tell your dad that you hear him. After all, that advice he’s given you about choosing the most competitive financial products on the market just might sink in. And that’s why you’ve not only enrolled in the best credit card rewards program you could find, you’ve also already accrued $7k in debt! Once you start building those rewards, you’ll be able to cash them in for amazing benefits: travel, technology, maybe even an iTunes gift card as a father’s day gift for dad. It’s the least you can do to say thanks for all that advice.

At this point Gwen Lawson‘s dad has gotten pretty good at tuning her out.

Image by harriswalkerphoto.