VIRGINIA BEACH, Va. — Though he lacks the ability to communicate verbally, local three-year-old dog Rusty has given clear indication to his owners he understands that when being a good boy is in question, he is that good boy.
According to sources, when asked “Who’s a good boy?” Rusty will stare delightedly in the direction of the speaker, wag his tail and open his mouth as if to reveal a smile, which is believed to mean “I am.”
“Rusty is as smart as he is good,” said Rusty’s owner Tim Conk. “He will even raise his paw to shake when you say ‘shake,’ and will shake if you shake it for him.”
Rusty declined to comment, but did turn three circles before lying down.
Reporters investigated just how good Rusty was aware he is and analyzed his reaction to a number of questions, including, “Isn’t ‘good’ a subjective adjective, and therefore varies depending on the person asking and the good boy being asked?” Also, “Would you prefer to be defined in more concrete terms?”
Rusty responded more positively when he heard the words “good” and “good boy,” but did not give a specific answer to either question. When asked questions unrelated to his own state of goodness, such as “What is your favorite website?” and “What’s your deal?” he responded with much less interest.
Other locals were asked about Rusty’s good boy self-awareness, including his dog neighbor and presumed friend Puddles, age five (35 in dog years). Puddles also declined to comment but did eat a dropped ice cube, believing it to be a treat.
Based on the information available, it is evident that Rusty is a good boy and he knows it. He’s good. He’s so good. Isn’t he? Yes he is. Who’s a good boy? He is.
Tyler Snodgrass is the Whiskey Journal’s resident good boy.
Image by Flickr.