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May 31, 2017

We Cleared Up Donald Trump’s Covfefe Tweet In One Simple Google Search

May 18, 2017

Roger Ailes’ Body Donated To Stifling Science

PALM BEACH, Fla. — Following reports of his death Thursday morning, the family of former Fox News president Roger Ailes has confirmed his body will be […]
May 17, 2017

Terrifying Development: Shooting Molten Lava At The Invading Volcano Monsters Seems To Only Make Them Stronger

Well this doesn’t look good. When legions of horrifying volcano monsters suddenly emerged from the center of the earth and began terrorizing cities around the globe, […]
May 10, 2017

Comey Firing Sends Shockwaves Through Dozen Or So Americans Still Keeping Up With All This

WASHINGTON — President Trump has fired embattled FBI director James Comey in a move that is being interpreted as a shocking overstep of authority by the […]
May 8, 2017

Tony Isn’t A Rapist Cause I Asked Him And He Said He Isn’t

Amid several reports that my friend Tony is a rapist, I decided to muster the courage to ask him myself. The verdict? He isn’t because he […]
May 8, 2017

Dad Receives All Those Nickels For Every Time He Heard That

NORTH HEMPSTEAD, N.Y. — Local father Rich MacGillicuddy was in rare form Monday when he was finally given a nickel for every time he heard that. The […]
March 21, 2017

Cool Parents Raising Big Weirdo

WESTERN SPRINGS, Ill. — In recent years, very cool parents Taylor and Anne Torrence have reportedly invested all of their efforts into making their daughter Moira […]
March 20, 2017

Bible Verse Shared On Facebook Just As God Intended

DES MOINES, Iowa — Multiple sources have reported that early this week Facebook user Jake Nelson, 27, was seen posting a Bible verse onto the social […]