Every time I bring up how hot worms are everyone looks at me like I’m a freak. Okay, wow. Really? Me, a freak? I beg to differ. In fact I challenge you to look at these pictures of worms and I dare you not to get turned on by them.
Did it just rain or are you just happy to see me? Look at this smooth little number making me all kinds of hot and bothered and–what? You aren’t turned on. Honestly? You can be honest with me. No? Okay, I guess she’s not everyone’s type. Let me show you another total knockout from my worm stash.
Hahaha, okay, she’s trying to tease us with her long slimy body. I see you, girl. Go on with your bad self. Okay, for real? I’m the only one tempted by this little slime mistress? Wow. I find that impossible to believe, so let me show you some more gorgeous babes–and by babes I mean worms.
This one is definitely NSFW!!! What? You think this is disgusting and I have a problem? Hmm. Wow. Interesting. So you are honestly attracted to your human partner? MORE THAN THIS WORM? I just… no, I won’t… I cannot believe that.
Last one. I defy you to look at this squirming minx and not absolutely cream your jeans. She shimmies up and down the rocks, through dirt and mud, and no red-blooded human can resist her worm wiggle. Oh, but you can? You seriously think you can? You are a freak and pervert. You can absolutely go fuck yourself because these worms won’t. They have dignity.
Stephanie Weber had to google pictures of worms in a crowded coffee shop with children around in order to write this. So who’s the freak now?
Image by pixabay.