Dieting Andrew Zimmern Fighting Craving For Deep-Fried Skunk Anus

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TUSCALOOSA, Ala. — Steeling himself against his urges, Travel Channel personality Andrew Zimmern fought an intense craving for deep-fried skunk anus today, sources reported. Indulging in the foodstuff would violate the diet the 56-year-old television show host is currently committed to.

“Oh man, that smells good,” Zimmern was overheard saying during a taping of Bizzare Foods that saw the host visit a local restaurant that specializes in the dish. “But I shouldn’t—I’d really, really love to, but I shouldn’t,” he added.

Sources on location reported that Zimmern’s craving for the food—a skunk’s anal lining pounded into thin sheets, dredged in eggs, covered in saltine-cracker crumbs, fried in peanut oil, and served with an anal-gland rémoulade—was so intense at times that he became distracted on camera and required multiple takes to complete scenes and narrations.

“I’m sorry, everyone,” a sweating Zimmern was overheard saying to the show’s crew. “I’m trying, but Jesus, I’m just dying to get a nibble of that stuff.”

A forlorn Zimmern was later seen leaving the restaurant and dry heaving as he attempted to eat a banana as a replacement snack for the fried anus.

Dan Delagrange bakes his skunk anus to make it a little healthier.

Image by garysoup.

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Dan Delagrange is a comedy writer and basketball nerd living in Chicago. Along with writing for The Whiskey Journal, he hosts the Below The Rim podcast, and he was a contributor at StarWipe and a writer for Scott Dikkers's book, "Trump's America: Buy This Book And Mexico Will Pay For It".