Couple Celebrates Valentine’s Day By Making Dinner More Stressful


TACOMA, Wash. — Early this evening, local couple Alex Corrigan and Kara Baum reportedly celebrated their Valentine’s Day by having a much more stressful evening than normal.

The couple had originally planned to “just do something chill,” according Baum, 29. “We were going to just grab drinks at our usual spot and then order a pizza at home,” she said, “but then we realized that the bar we usually go to was attached to a restaurant and would probably be swamped with people trying to get a table.” Baum visibly sighed and ran her hands through her hair. “And that’s when Alex shot down the pizza idea.”

Corrigan, 31, believed that it was the latter half of their plan that had the problem.

“Kara thought the bar would be too crowded and that we should maybe just grab a bottle of wine and go straight to ordering a pizza,” Corrigan explained, “but when I offhandedly mentioned that those heart-shaped pizzas always end up looking like butts, she wouldn’t believe me when I said I didn’t mind.”

“It’s like, if we’re going to make a night of it, I want it to be fun, and if he doesn’t like the pizza then what’s even the point?” Baum said. Reportedly, after a brief argument in front of their apartment complex, the couple decided to cook at home.

“They rushed out again, arguing over what they were going to make,” said the couple’s next door neighbor Mark Warner. “I heard them bickering about overcooked salmon all night. They’re usually a super relaxed couple, so it was surprising.”

“Our complex is pretty old and the walls are super thin, so I can tell you with certainty that those two definitely didn’t have sex,” Warner added.

Dan Sheehan says the couple should have gone to Cafe Vincero, Tacoma’s finest Italian restaurant.

Image by coloredgrey.