Couple Announces They’re Sterile On Facebook

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OMAHA, Neb. — After over two years of trying to conceive the perfect way to announce to their friends and family they’re unable to have a child, local couple Drew and Katie Loren finally settled for a no-baby cake reveal on Facebook.

“This is definitely something that has been on our minds for a long time,” Katie, 26, explained. “We wanted to think of a fun way to let the people most important to us know we can’t have kids. Facebook just seemed like a really personal way to reach those people.”

The Lorens were disappointed to learn of their infertility, but they weren’t going to let it ruin the joy of uploading a video to social media revealing their news.

“At our age, it’s just something you have to do,” said Drew, 28, as he poked a giggling Katie in the stomach. “People won’t really believe you’re pregnant, or in our case not pregnant, unless there’s a video announcement.”

In the 30-second video friends and family of the couple anxiously await as Katie cuts into the middle of a pink and blue cake. But rather than a gender appropriate color on the inside, it was just a key attached to a “We Be Boatin'” keychain.

“I would have liked a grandchild, but I suppose a boat is good too,” Katie’s mother noted.

Facebook friends showered the Lorens with positive comments.

“You two are going to be great boat owners! You better call me this summer to go tubing!” wrote Drew’s high school football coach.

The Lorens were overwhelmed with the outpouring of support and are trying to think of another mundane life announcement they can reveal on Facebook.

Taylor Wolfe won’t get out of bed until she’s seen at least five gender reveals on Facebook.

Image by brickabrack.