98% Of Relationship Spent Sharing Links To Articles


DES MOINES, Iowa — A recent study has found that 98% of the romantic relationship between Carrie Carson and Lou Jahns is spent sharing links to articles.

The couple, who both work day jobs that have them spending a majority of their time on the computer, browse the internet for a majority of the day and send each other articles via e-mail and Facebook chat. The articles range from adorable animals showing inter-species affection to the injustices of the world, complete with captions like “wow, this makes me sick.” A majority of the responses to those messages range from “ugh, terrible” to “smh” all in agreement of the horrible social misfortunes happening in the world. On the other hand, the cute articles are often met with emojis that have heart eyes or a crying face, presumably in tears from how adorable the animals are.

“There are so many things I see throughout my day that remind of Carrie,” Lou said, who sends an estimated fifteen articles a day to his girlfriend of two years. “So I want to send her that to show her that I’m thinking about her and also hope that I’m not wasting my time reading hours of pointless articles that distract me from my horrible data entry job.”

Carrie added that the articles make for nice conversation starters that keep the two of them in constant contact with each other.

“I could send these articles to different friends of mine but then they would be annoyed with me. My boyfriend is forced to continue engaging with me despite being annoyed, so I send them to him.” Carrie explained, adding that she also shares hilarious memes that her funny friend Sharie posts on Facebook. “Sometimes the articles stimulate amazing conversations.”

Carrie provided the example of an article she just read about Men’s Rights Activists that would incite conversation between the couple over dinner.

“When we met up for Thai food later, I asked him ‘Did you read that article I sent?’ and he said yeah and we were both like ‘That’s crazy, right?’ So we talked about that.”

According to the study done exclusively on the couple the other 2% of their relationship is dedicated to binge watching TV shows they’ve already seen and trying that new tiki bar around the corner.

Stephanie Weber spends a majority of her relationships writing articles about her relationships. 

Image by Ray_LC/AustinEvan.