SALT LAKE CITY – After months of rumors that the company was in poor ethical health, Girls Gone Wild has officially filed for moral bankruptcy, sources say.
“Girls Gone Wild is excited to discharge its moral debts so we can start exploiting illiterate teenagers with the conscious of a newborn babe,” said Joe Francis, the company’s founder.
Moral experts say the timing of the petition is no surprise, as several creditors have recently threatened to foreclose on Francis’s soul.
“I’m saving my company, I’m keeping my soul, and I’ve got two tickets to Cozumel if any of you bitches are interested,” said Francis, who was accompanied by two bikini-clad “legal experts.”
Girls Gone Wild filed for moral bankruptcy in the Court of Public Opinion, located in Salt Lake City’s “green light” district.
The company’s petition lists thousands of moral debts, ranging from “that time we filmed the topless pillow fight between 14-year-olds” to “every time Joe Francis opened his mouth.”
The petition also identifies dozens of unsecured creditors, including Good Taste Inc, Common Decency LLC, and That Girl is Someone’s Daughter Co.
John Clark filed for moral bankruptcy in 2007, 2009, and 2012.