DETROIT — Amber Chapman is well aware of the physical and emotional toll work can wreak on an individual, let alone a marriage. She and her husband Todd, both accountants at different firms in Detroit, routinely work 50-60 hour weeks. According to Chapman, the rigorous work schedule can hamper any would-be romantic inclinations between the two.
Sometimes all it takes a little spicing up in the bedroom to rekindle a relationship, and Chapman, 31, believed she had just the remedy to rejuvenate her love life.
She decided to enroll her husband Todd in improv classes at GoComedy — a local comedy school in downtown Detroit, with hopes it would inspire an interest in role playing that could eventually segue into the bedroom.
It turns out her presumption held true, but in the worst possible way.
Chapman indicated the couple began experimenting with role playing in bed shortly after his initial class. But before long, he started ”joking out” in the scenarios, opting for a cheap laugh in lieu of believable relationship driven situations.
“Just last week, he asked for a ‘suggestion,’ to get us started. I was excited from the get-go. I told him that he was a sexy milkman and I was a recently single divorcee and my children were away with their father for the weekend.”
In the most seductive voice she could conjure, Chapman told Todd “my children aren’t here and I’ve been yearning for this milk for days.” Her husband reportedly responded by challenging Chapman to a gallon challenge, and to hurry because the lunch bell was going to ring soon.
“At first, we were both really turned on, and into this scenario. Then before we could transition into actual intimacy, I guess we were somehow transported to a school?… Then he ran the length of our bedroom floor. Later on he called this a ‘sweep edit.”
Chapman indicated Todd proceeded to initiate a new scene, in which he was a completely different character — a “farmer,” she recalled, and he started calling her “Old Bess” and tried to milk her.
“At that point, I decided I’d had enough. I looked him square in the eye and said ‘forget it,’ to which he responded ‘my cow’s gone mad!”
Written by Rob Gregory